[compilers_nitw] Corporate lessons

Lesson 1:

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to 
lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes 
out. The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish" "Me first! 
Me 
first!" says the admin. clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a 
speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone. "Me next! Me 
next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the 
beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and 
the 
love of my life." Poof! He's gone. "OK, you're up," the Genie says to 
the manager. The manager says, "I want those two back in the office 
after lunch." 

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.




Lesson 2:

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked 
him,"Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" The  crow 
answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the 
crow, 
and rested. 
A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it. 
Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be 
sitting very high up. 



Lesson 3:

A turkey was chatting with a bull "I would love to be able to get to 
the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, but I haven't got the 
energy." 
"Well, why don't you nibble on my droppings?" replied the bull. 
"They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung 
and found 
that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the 
tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second 
branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at 
the 
top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey 
out of the tree. 

Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top,  but it wont keep 
you there 



Lesson 4:

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her 
shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a 
towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, 
the 
next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you 
$800 to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops 
her 
towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands 
her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and 
goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, 
"Who was that?" "It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies. 
"Great!" 
the husband says, "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?" 

Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with 
your shareholders in time, you may be in a  position to prevent 
avoidable 
exposure.